I am a woman. I love being a woman. But there are days when I wish I wasn't one. American women are bananas.

A) Makeup. Why anyone would want to put that much glop all over their face is beyond me. For pictures, I can understand a little bit - so often lips seem to disappear in photographs. But in general.. no way. Yucky.

B) Perfume. Why anyone would want to walk down a hallway smelling like an overgrown begonia is also beyond me. I can't stand the smell, and if I didn't know that they were so used to it they couldn't smell it, I would wonder how they stood the smell. Double yucky.

C) Weight. There is such a thing as being over weight. There is also such a thing as being underweight. And women are so self conscious about how they compare to airbrushed models and TV commercials that they lose all sense of their own inherent beauty. If you feel healthy, if you can do all the things you want to do, if you are satisfied with your own body, what else do you need? and the scale is the most unreliable way to measure fitness.

D) Irrational behavior. I suppose men are victim to this too, but yikes. Seems to me I've met a lot more psycho women in my day than men. Wish more women weren't afraid to use their brains.